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Free Advice

5/23/2016

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Have you ever offered free advice to someone only to have it ignored? Have you ever tried to point someone back on life’s right track only to see them continue down the wrong path?
 
If so, you’re not alone. Everyone who wants what is best for others has probably been disappointed when loved ones reject help or wisdom.
 
The more I study the Bible’s wisdom, the more I’ve discovered that maybe I have been the foolish one.
 
Proverbs 23:9 says, “Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the good sense of your words.”
 
Jesus said it this way in Matthew 7:6, “Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.”
 
Rather than spending all of my time on people who don’t want my unsolicited advice, I would be wise to pay attention to those seeking my assistance.
 
Does this give us reason to write people off? Certainly not. We should have our hearts and eyes open to anyone in need of our help. However, once they’ve demonstrated no interest in our help, we should respect that decision. Yes, we continue to love such people, but we cannot assume responsibility for them or take over their freewill. Attempting to do so is called codependency, and such an arrangement is emotionally destructive and spiritually unhealthy for both parties.
 
On the flipside, some sadly refuse to help anyone because one or two people in the past refused or abused their help. When you or I come to such a conclusion, we have made helping others about us – “If one person won’t accept my help, then no one is deserving of it!” And if I seek to be someone’s savior, I have missed the purpose of service. Neither entering into a co-dependent relationship nor hardening one’s heart is a healthy response to others.
 
But we can continue to serve and bless others. Not everyone accepted Jesus’ help. People today still refuse his message and his sacrifice. Yet he continues serving those who come to him. May we be blessed and be a blessing by doing the same.
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    Blaine Kelly

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